25 Days of Douchebagery: Day 17: Ten Best Christmas Movies, Ever!

The end of the year is the perfect season for top ten lists, and lists happen to be a favorite of mine. I’ve compiled my last list of the year (and most epic at that!) The Top 10 BEST Holiday Movies, Ever. Well, at least according to me, and I happen to have a wonderful taste in holiday movies. Check out the list below, put a smile on that miserable face and get yourself into the holiday spirit, Scrooge.

 

blackxmas10BLACK CHRISTMAS (2006)

What’s better than an absolutely terrible horror movie about Christmas? Black Christmas tells the story of an escaped maniac who returns to his childhood home, which is now a sorority house, on Christmas Eve and starts to murder the sisters one by one. Directed by Glen Morgan with actresses such as Michelle Trachtenberg and Mary Elizabeth Winstead, what could be better to get your family in the Christmas spirit?

jinglealltheway9. JINGLE ALL THE WAY (1996)

Ah yes, a gem from Governor Schwarzennegger and Sinbad, clearly two of the best actors of our time. Jingle All The Way tells the story of a father who decides to fight Christmas masses and “dream the impossible”: secure a Turbo Manaction figure for his son, right before Christmas. From director Brian Levant, this Christmas comedy is totally a classic that truly never gets old and brings lots of laughs!

frinch8. DR. SEUSS’: HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (2000)

“Maybe Christmas doesn’t come from a store. Maybe Christmas perhaps, means a little bit more.” A complete Christmas classic, originally released in 1966 in cartoon form, the updated version is certainly a favorite with the hilarity of Jim Carrey as the Grinch himself and sassiness The Pretty Reckless’ front woman, Taylor Momsen, as Cindy Lou Who. If you don’t know the story of the Grinch by now, this is definitely something you need to watch ASAP.

thesantaclause7. THE SANTA CLAUSE (1994)

From director John Pasquin, Tim Allen stars as the big red man himself, Santa Claus. In the movie, Tim Allen’s character inadvertently kills Santa on Christmas Eve, and magically he finds himself recruited to take Santa’s place!  If you’re looking for a feel good Christmas movie, you’ve found it.

miracleon34thst6. MIRACLE ON 34TH ST (1994)

As one of the most famous holiday movies, Miracle on 34th St. stars Elizabeth Perkins (Matilda, aka the best child actress of all time, fight me on it) and Richard Attenborough, as Santa. The story tells of Perkins (6) who doubts the existence of Santa Claus, due to her mother spilling the “secret” to her long ago, but after meeting a department store Santa (who’s convinced he’s the real jolly man himself) Susan is given something to believe in. Truly a beautiful holiday story for little ones who are starting to get suspicious and you want them to behave for “Santa” a few years longer.

polarexpress5. THE POLAR EXPRESS (2004)

Okay, so I’m probably one of the last people on this earth who loves Christmas and has not seen this movie! (Though it is currently #1 on my Netflix instant queue, so I’ll get around to it when I stop binge watching Once Upon a Time) I can’t tell you what I love about this movie, but from what I’ve heard this movie is literally one of the best Christmas movies in existence. Directed by Robert Zemeckis, The Polar Express tells the story of a doubting boy who boards a magic train to the North Pole and Santa Claus’ home.

elf4. ELF (2003)

“Buddy the Elf, what’s your favorite color?” Will Ferrell, as Buddy the Elf, makes for the funniest Christmas movie of all time, but what else would you expect from a comedy genius? Directed by Jon Favreau, Elf tells the story of a human who grew up in the North Pole as an elf who makes his way to the US to find out his true identity. If you haven’t seen this movie, immediately stop what you’re doing and go watch it, you won’t regret those 97 minutes for one single second.

muppetxmascarol3. THE MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL (1992)

Directed by the wonderful and talented Brian Henson, The Muppet Christmas Carol tells their version of the classic tale by Charles Dickens of Mr. Scrooge and his redemption on Christmas Eve. I have a really weird love for Tiny Tim and every time I see a version of A Christmas Carol I want to reach into the TV and take him and make him better. (I know, that’s really strange don’t judge me) But as versions of this story go, this version is the absolute best.

achristmasstory2. A CHRISTMAS STORY (1983)

If you’re from under a rock at the bottom of the ocean, then this explanation of this movie is for you because every other person on this earth cannot avoid seeing this movie no matter how hard they try. (No, literally it starts playing on TBS on 12/24 at 8:00 PM and doesn’t stop until 6:00 PM on 12/25, every 2 hours) Directed by Bob Clark, A Christmas Story tells the story of Ralphie, who has to convince all the older influences in his life that a Red Ryder B.B. gun is really the perfect Christmas gift for the 1940s.

nightmarebeforexmas1. THE  NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS (1993)

Follow Jack Skellington, the Pumpkin King, as he discovers there are more holidays besides Halloween. Through a journey through the trees, Jack discovers Christmastown and brings tries Christmas to all of his ghoul like friends, including Sally, based off the bride of Frankenstein. Directed by Henry Selick and written by Tim Burton, The Nightmare Before Christmas features characters voiced by Danny Elfman and Catherine O’Hara.

 

 

Share this bitch!

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.