The Weekend WTF?! 5/25/12

Hey folks! Because the world is usually a giant, crazy, shitty place on a regular basis, I’ve decided to bring back the ‘Weekend WTF?!’ in an attempt to get those of you out there who haven’t been trolling the internet in search of ridiculousness. So, since you’ve all been lazy assholes and its a long holiday weekend, here’s what your world has had to offer this week:

Vial of Ronald Reagan’s blood: Auction called off

Because, let’s be real, why wouldn’t you want to have a vial of our country’s 40th president? To be completely honest, it’s a little scary that someone was willing to pay over $30K for blood residue belonging to the douche responsible for the fucking Iran Contra.

Stuck ketchup problem solved by MIT engineers

In a world that is plagued with war, famine, disease and the Bravo network, super-productive engineers at MIT have finally rid our planet with one of the most perplexing issues of our generation. But would it really hurt for fat bastards to have to work a little to slather their food with excessive amounts of condiments?

Cat Divorce: Israeli Man Divorces Wife Over Her 550 Cats

Seriously, bravo to this dude. Dealing with your crazy bitch of a wife (no offense to the 3 wives on planet Earth who aren’t) can be bad enough. Imagine finally finding the love of your life, only to realize that down the road she will be adopting over 500 creatures that will judge you just as much as she will? Fuck that noise.

 

Have a badass holiday weekend everyone and remember to eat yourselves retarded,

Jersey John

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